If Only I Can Kiss Away The Pain.

I feel as if there is a lot of ideas in me that needs to be let loose tonight.
So i am just going to let it out.

The Beginning.

So i came to Perth with the preparation of being alone and boring for the rest of my time here. Good thing / lucky thing that i have a primary school friend here, so she kinda showed me around for the 1st month i was here.

In the beginning, it was a friend thing and i myself treated her like one. And me being me, i am always friendly with people as long as i can click with them. So i did not bother much about it.
After a month or so, my network of friends expended, uni started, and so i guess we did not meet up as much as before. That was normal i suppose, but i still make the effort to be in contact over the phone cause i think its only right to still make an effort to be friends.

I guess things changed when i went clubbing for the first time since i was here. I told her the following day just to keep things updated and all just like friends would. Her reply was "OMG, pls dun contact me anymore." I thought she was joking, so we still kept in contact.

But after a while, i sense a shift in attitude. Thats where it hit me, my friend told me that didnt it occur to me that she might like me. And in her own view, she obviously thinks she like me. Well, i didnt take too much to heart what she thought till one night where she asked me out for dinner together with her housemate.

That night she TOTALLY ignored me. Man, luckily i know her housemate quite well, so i still had somebody to talk to. FUCK, i dont know whether i am the one with fried brains or is it really the case. But i and her housemate talked to a point where she made a comment, you know, sometimes girls have a wrong impression of you because they think they can relate to you, and therefore start liking you, but then they fail to realise you are actually like this to everyone else. Maybe that phrase fitted the conversation we were talking about, but then again, it might relate to something else.

No matter what, i was shell shocked. She was the last person i expected to be so shallow.

Swing Swing Swing

So now having got that over with, i got a shock for my assignment. I was given a 52% for it. Well, i scored high distinction for my analysis, but failed for my report finding. Judging it was my 1st ever report, and i having no prior idea wad a report is, i suppose its a good thing. At least i treat it as a learning experience.

On a brighter note, i scored 80% and above for the other 2 tests i took. So i guess i aint that stupid and thus can stop doubting my own ability for university.

When You Say Nothing At All

The reason for all my post seems to be because there is something FUCKING wrong with everything out there and it seems like i am the only RIGHT one.

1. I hope all irresponsible parents die.
2. Thank God (whoever you might be) that i have such a perfect family, even though the credit must all go to my dad who made it all possible even with his lone effort.
3. Thank God (whoever you might be again) for making me such a LUCKY bastard-
3.1 Having the opportunity to make for myself $50,000 and putting it to good use now that i am studying overseas.
4. A whole lot of credits to my dad because -
4.1 You made me a sensible person since i was a kid.
4.2 You groom me to who i am today.
4.3 You taught me the importance of being responsible, financial security, the idea of family, to be able to face myself in the mirror everyday and be proud of what i am today.
4.4 To know that i can always rely on you no matter what happens.

The reason for my outburst is because of all the unjust i see...

1. Why should a child carry the burden of her parents?
2. Why make a child go through the agony of coming overseas and having to worry about finances after?

I would imagine a parent to be mature and responsible. Not act like 2 fucking kid trying to figure things out among themselves. Cmon, as FUCKING PARENTS, have more sense then that.

SOMETIMES I FEEL MORE ADULT THEN ADULTS THEMSELVES.

THEREFORE I THANK GOD (WHOEVER YOU MIGHT BE AGAIN) FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE BECAUSE I COME TO REALISE THAT THINGS WORKED OUT SO MUCH BETTER FOR ME.

In The End.. (To My Ex)

In the end, it doesnt really matter...
I went to a church cell group today. They were talking about the 10 commandments. I came to realise that you actually broke one, Thou shall not commit adultery. You came to my mind, and knowing u are Catholic, i dont know what to think.

Dont get me wrong. I forgave you.

It just got me wondering whether did your Faith played as much as importance as you say it did. And if it did, did doing what you do changed anything?
How do you face yourself everyday?

Did i give you more credit then you really deserved?

PS : I have already let bygones be bygones, forgive and forget. The above entry has nothing to do with my sore ego or anything. Its just my thoughts.

To all you players out there, welcome its here.